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Know Jack #459 Public Service Announcement

Writer's picture: Jack LaFountainJack LaFountain

There is no blindness as debilitating as hypocrisy. It is an insidious disease. It causes the human body to produce a euphoria of innocence that encapsulates the affected area. Hypocrisy then feeds on the euphoria the body produces.


Contrary to the current literature, having an unfavorable viewpoint of people or their actions is not a sound basis for a diagnosis of hypocrisy. This is true even when those opinions deviate widely from those opinions generally accepted by the masses. Case studies have found that opinions widely disseminated through means of mass communication actually promote spread of this disease for which there is no natural immunity.


Signs and symptoms of hypocrisy include incongruent speech/behavior. For example, proclaiming universal inclusion while grouping people by identifying factors in which the factors themselves are assigned specific traits. Whether those traits are assigned positive or negative connotations is immaterial. It is the assigning of them that is a hallmark of hypocrisy.

Ideological macular degeneration, the blurring of focus on the periphery is a precursor to the selective deafness/vision often found in hypocrites. Most of the study in this area has been centered on people professing Christianity. This is unfortunate as the disease can afflict anyone who engages in any form of self-identification.


Paranoid labeling is also among the symptoms of hypocrisy. For these hypocrites it is not enough that those who criticize to be wrong, they must be evil. Thus, any disagreeable expression must be hate speech and the speaker a “hater”. The greater the latent paranoia, the more rapid is a person’s descent into hypocritical counterattack.


However, the gold standard for a definitive diagnosis remains the Anubis Test in which the afflicted person assigns a heavier weight to the imperfections of others than he does to the same or similar imperfections in himself. The test is named after the Egyptian god who weighed hearts and admitted only those found to be light as a feather.


Preventative treatment is the best course. The disease is more readily treatable when detected early. This is accomplished with regular self-examination utilizing the motes and beams method. Treating and evaluating others using the same scale as you use for yourself has shown real promise in preventing hypocrisy. As of this writing, it remains seldom used.



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